It’s kinda wild to think of being five years away from forty. Forty used to seem so old. Funny, the closer I get to it, the less old it seems. Probably because in reality I don’t feel that old. And wonder if I ever will. I remember my grandma telling me that she still feels like the same fourteen year old who married my grandpa some six decades ago… “only when I look in the mirror do I realize I’m not!” :) and I laugh even typing that because I realize how more and more I know exactly what she means. The wrinkles popping up, the bags under the eyes, gravity pulling things the wrong way! ha~
In all seriousness though, I don’t mind getting older. I’ve loved my thirties, and wouldn’t want to go back for anything.. well, maybe just the anti gravity part. :) But other than that ~ I feel more settled. more at peace. more content with who I am and where I’m at. My perspective is different, it seems on everything!
I think back to my late teens, early twenties, before I was married. I used to travel with the home schooling group we were in and speak at regional seminars to the women! Sessions like, “How to find true rest as a mom.” Then I got married and had kids for myself. :) Yeah, I see you smiling. Oh my goodness!!! How many times have I thought about things I said to those women and realized sheesh, I didn’t have a clue! Not one. Words are easy. Life is hard. :)
I think my twenties were a bit of an identity crisis for me… discovering who I truly was. Newly married. New mom. New country. Shayne pastoring a small church. People there not really getting me, nor me them. On so many levels I was trying to find my footing. Unsure and shakingly stumbling through to find the ground I would root myself to on different areas and issues. I thank God for my husband who was a rock. That led me to the Higher Rock~! Together in those early years, the twenties, we found our way. Not a conclusive way, as we’re discovering… :) We’re not the same people we were ten years ago. And I doubt we’ll be the same ten years from now. I used to think that would be a terrible quality about someone, to not remain the same. Now, I think it’s one of the best we can have. I hope I never stop learning. discovering. and growing in who I am as a person.
As the saying goes, “When I was young I thought I had all the answers. Now, I’m not even sure what the questions are!”
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Shayne took me out on Friday. We always joke about my birthday holding “monumental moments.” It is just not a dull time of year for us. And Friday was no different. A phone call from a customer who owes Shayne 12,ooo dollars and who had said two weeks ago he was going to pay (a huge answer to prayer), called to say now he’d changed his mind! () Which, you’d have to know the whole story… actually didn’t really surprise us with this man. But, after all, it was my birthday! Another call, this one from a friend, that ended up with concluding a bit hurtful. I know Shayne so well, and though he wasn’t saying anything I could tell by his face that it wasn’t good what he was hearing on the other end. I finally just said loud enough for the man to hear me, “Hello!! It’s my birthday. Can we do this another time!!”
And before you think my birthday was ruined, it wasn’t!! We laugh about it. I mean, I wouldn’t know what to do if something out of the ordinary didn’t happen on that day~ Reality, God has been doing some major heart searching and cleaning in both of our lives. (changing us again) And we’re re-learning that these kind of situations – – customers not paying. friends being hurtful. even birthdays not going according to plan, are all GOOD things. vital things. NEEDED things. Because they send us to the arms of Jesus who gently reminds us that all that happens is from His hand, to make us more like Him.
I love my husband for so many reasons. But one of the main ones is because he points me back to the face of Christ when I lose focus. I’ve said to so many single girls – “Hey, don’t be looking for the tallest. hottest. best dressed guy around. Trust me, you want one who loves Jesus and will teach you how to love Him more.” As boringly prude as it sounds, bottom line, it’s not the physical stuff that gets ya through. (though those are a nice add on!) :)
(the second shot is a box of records. I showed one to my kids a few wks back who couldn’t figure out how they made cd players big enough in cars to play those!) :)
We perused the treasures of a few antique stores. A favorite past time of mine. Not only do I like looking for things for myself, I love thinking about the people before who’ve used these. History and people and how they functioned and lived fascinate me. World War II, my absolute favorite time in history!
We headed to this vintage clothing store. I met the owner at the Sarah Palin rally we went to in the fall. We stood shoulder to shoulder the entire two hours and she chatted my head off. I didn’t mind. She really was a sweet old lady. And I wished I had taken a picture of her in the store that day ~ she looks like what I imagine Princess Leia of Star Wars to look like now. She wears her hair in two twisted buns on the side of her head. Such an adorable chipper type person she was. Shayne thought she was a bit “odd.” But I don’t think eccentric is odd! :)
(trying on some of the great hats! I bought a really cute little brown one)
We went on to a fabulous meal at J. Alexanders. Their spinach queso dip is amazing. Though I’m a sucker for any kind of dip that contains spinach pretty much!
From there we headed to the modern vintage clothing store ~ where prices are only slightly a few hundred more than the little place we’d just been! ;)
Any other FANS of this place?
Bought the last dress. Loved the second one, but too expensive. And thought the sweater was adorable and a great price for 20 bucks! Seemed too good to be true though, so double checked with a sales person who told me that was an error – it was actually 120! I smiled and thanked her, then walked away and stuck it back on the rack. :)
We ended our time at one of my favorite parks. Shayne decided I should have some birthday shots (wink), and so we had fun with that for awhile. I really end up feeling rather dumb when someone is taking my picture. Especially my husband – I get kinda shy and school girlish, so in most I look like a dork. But, some turned out okay~
Back to moms for dessert!
(and yep.. this is a rug! my old one was so worn and thin. and this one is fluffy and WARM! i hate(d) going to the bathroom in the middle of the night because the floor was always so stinkin cold. :/ so this helps. :) now to just find a toilet seat in the same material i’d be set!! hee. hee. thanks Suz~)
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I’m grateful for this new year of LIFE!! (I love that word) I find myself excited and hopeful and somehow just very trusting (in a new calm sort of way for me) to think about what the days ahead will hold. And though I don’t know exactly what’s in store – that’s where the excited part comes in. I know that the Lord has already been there. He has everything already planned – that’s where the hopeful part comes in. And more than it just being planned. He has a purpose – that’s where the trusting part comes in.
Thanks to each of you who left such sweet comments and wishes~
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